Seeing more clearly...

About a month ago, I started having some slight vision problems while reading, driving and prolonged hours of computer work.   I found I needed progressive glasses for the first time in my life.  Strangely enough, I took a liking to the fact that I have yet gone into another stage of growth and proposed the synopsis that I'm viewing things more clearly in these more mature years.
With this clarity, I have been testing my ability to envision the future, heal from the past and help others grasp the possibility of a more positive view on life in general.  These characteristics are also unveiling a need to connect with past pains, unsolved trials and blocked memories that I so conveniently have deleted; choosing not to see because I figure, 'what's past is forgotten' but is it really?  The funniest thing about it all is that it isn't just me.  Others around me are 'finding themselves' as well, and in their connection to me, I am morphed through inclusion and remembering too.  Is it fundamentally so hard to believe that we all "see" together?  And if we are collectively open, understanding and loving about the healing process, we'll never have to be alone in the search for understanding.
For example, my grandfather is over 50 years older than I yet in a much need conversation just yesterday, I found that this estranged member of our remaining elders has more in common with my expressions of kindness and paying forward mentality than I ever would have thought when I was growing up in Kansas.  He was a whole different person then with a whole different role.  His views were more dominating and he wasn't much of a conversationalist.  He was the provider, out of sight and my grandmother entertained the matriarch role.
In our conversation, he made mention that after my daughter passed in the early 80's, I would stay in my room and play the saddest songs on my flute.  Sadly enough, I don't even recollect his presence during the ordeal, playing my flute however on the contrary, I do remember that when I lost Kara, my desire for music art was buried with her.
It's surprising that every few years or so, as the environment changes,  as we mature or as the universe shifts as loved ones pass away, that all of our roles change.  Purpose and meaning takes on a less 'blurry' picture, the fine print is less argumentative and the simple definition of life is all that rings divine.
What I see as most important now is that we all have the capability to change our prescription for life's journey.  It's comforting to know that there is something for us all to slip over the fuzziness that will make things clearer.  Through God, your faith, family and loved ones you care for and about, you can see the resolve and take the necessary steps to move forward in healing and caring for the treasured gift of a fresh new awakening of clear sight.
God bless and take care...
Chelle

When nobody IS somebody

Around 7 years ago, I was in a mentally abusive relationship with a self-addictive individual who I had allowed to take an emotional toll on my sense of self and confidence as a loving, caring person.  I resorted to writing a poem in this time of grief (shown at the end of this post), gesturing to the Universe that I was in need of relief proclaiming I was ready to become proactive in the cure.

I think there is a time in all of our lives where we have allowed another to take our joy, causing us to forget who we are and that the God of our faith has a mate for us,  or a purpose that fills that void or possibly an activity that will challenge our spirit, bring love inside our total being and direct us onto the path we were designed for at birth.  "Another" is different for us all and can take the form of a relationship, social group, occupation or dependency.

Recognizing that nobody IS somebody creates a turning point where we begin to acknowledge that healing is imminent through choice and understanding that we ALL deserve to be loved by someone, give/share love or perform loving acts into the community and for society.  All these positive energies are converged into the soul and illuminated by fashioning our individual aura.  

Sharing is caring and if this message is meant for you, receive my blessings and know that you are worthy to take the next steps to shed nobody and create your somebody...

 

Just call me nobody…

An invisible icon on your desktop; only the user knows where the program is run.

Just call me nobody…the shut down in my system has just begun

I have always wondered why I am led into one-sided relationships

Just call me nobody…the ability for tolerance and oversight, I can no longer permit

No one that is close to you knows my name; everyone in my life has spoken to you or seen your face

Just call me nobody; in your photograph, no special person fills that accompanying space

The best way to release yourself from bondage is to set another free

Just call me nobody…I know that before I can feel happiness, with you I cannot be

So many fond memories, yet the future is uncertain

The end of another chapter, the last act closes the curtain

Just call me nobody, do you remember me? 

You’ll never see my emotions, there for your needs

Caught in the dark, afraid to confront the light

No reason to commit to me because, sarcastically, I have all the time in the world

“Nobody” tolerates all heartache and is the continuous caretaker

Forgiving, non-judgmental, with its own heartache unattended

Won’t place blame but knows who’s at fault

Disappointed once again, but that’s Ok, I can take it

And who takes care of nobody? 

Nobody...because no one even knows that nobody is suffering

In summary, a nobody must learn to take care of oneself…or forever live in sorrow

Believe in your strength, let go today, don’t wait for tomorrow

by Michelle J Epperson

August 5, 2003

Revel in all things positive...you always have a choice!

So, two years ago I was posting my third anniversary for my locks and it is pretty unbelievable that time passes so suddenly and my inspiration for keeping them has grown even more.  After five years, I can't imagine living without natural hair and so thankful the concept became a reality for sharing through a single blessed individual's idea.
I have analyzed that the longer we experience this existence called life, we can choose to participate or eliminate in learning and expanding our growth while building healthy memories to keep us moving forward. 
Positive energy is powerful especially when you envision the possibilities in your daily routine.  I have watched people around me take their dreams and turn them into reality [even for just a moment in time] by knowing and seeing themselves in that moment.  I am always looking for little miracles to happen to those I truly care about and when I see them, I have to remind them that we talked about that happening, that development, that manifestation, that warrants itself phenomenal.  When we forget to acknowledge these things, we place ourselves under the spell of vanity and forget that there is a power much higher and magical than our human hands could ever put together so perfectly. 
I praise all of the gifts that I have received and the network of loved ones that continue to support me even if they don't always agree with my choices.  It's all about free will and that's what makes being a creation of God so perfect.  We always have a choice.
It's also important to remember not get disheartened when those choices may lead us in a direction where we may have to experience solitude, changing our path and a different association and changed network of souls.  Sometimes, even our own family members can take us off course and embrace us only if we conform to relationships that are unhealthy and damaging.  I witness more and more accounts of children (mostly once entered into adulthood) who abandon their parents.  Then parents who gloat in their children's adulthood and cease teaching and caring for their welfare.  And most saddening, couples who believe that living a mediocre lifestyle of acceptance, toleration of entrapment and not believing in soul mates is the same as accepting God's will to live in matrimony.  But then there is the alternative and all scenarios take hard work, commitment and the ability to recognized the truth.  You don't have to live any other life except the one that the Universe delivers in harmony but you may have to turn your back on some damaging personalities that you may have mistaken as friends and loved ones.  An individual's position does not make them bound to you in that position if they are hurting you or making you question your love of self.  If it feels right, it is...if it is painful, you need to safely work your way out and remove yourself.
Life is simple...keep love and light in it, create your Earthly family that will bring joy in your experience and thank God for his graces and miracles, especially the ones you learn to manifest!
Peace to all and revel in all things positive,
Chelle E